Sawubona, Namaste!

Sawubona ( Zulu): From si- (“we”) -ya- (present tense) -wu- (“you”) -bona (“to see”), therefore literally meaning "we see you".

Namaste: ( nah- mah- stay) - my soul honors your soul. I honor the place in you where the entire universe resides. I honor the light, love, truth beauty and peace within you because it is also within me. In sharing these things, we are united, we are the same, we are one. *

At which point on a dating site do the people stop becoming people and just become faces. Covers of meat bags. Shades of potential fucks. Paintings on a free art show. Images on a passing screenplay. Just faces with no meaning nor depth nor personality. 

While you're scrolling down deciding that you'd rather have your heart broken by someone who actually looks worthwhile, when is the hope lost in finding more? 

Is it initial? The carelessness and disregard of layers that make up a human being or are we just unaware that by the time the online dating account is setup, we've already lost much hope for meaning,  in people who like ourselves would rather hide behind a screen than expose themselves to torturous scrutiny at a public venue while endlessly trying to shine, simultaneously without upsetting cultural expectation and norms? 

Do we upon engaging already know that this, this has more potential to being a waste of energy and time rather than create something beautiful or do we naiively act on, hoping to illude someone long enough for them to get trapped in us so that upon discovering the truth they may wanna stay. Or are we hoping that what we find here will be indeed enough, and start something real and lasting. After all we've heard of worse beginnings. 

And in time, these pseudonames and aliases start to have meaning. They detach the person behind the screen with the person on the screen. Souls detached from being. Just shadows on a playground. Beautiful figures to look at. Artistic works of advertising campaigns marketing products that CAN be sold. Bodies that can be bought with the right bidding. So much variety, bodies that can be disposed just as quickly. Suddenly, faces that can be bold, behind the screen... 

I think I prefer to smile at strangers. 

After all, looking at these profiles, after a while all I can see is myself. I see no souls. Just me. Looking back, lonely and empty and waiting to be filled. Waiting to be entertained and loved and cherished. Demanding from my audience a fulfillment which is really my own responsibility. And the physical  says, fall back into yourself because all you will ever need is already right here. 

Where is the god in you? I see no gods online, just faces. I want to smile at strangers  and greet them. Back home they would greet back. Here, it's a gamble. I want to say, namaste, I recognize god in you and afford you depth before you prove it. Give you the benefit of the doubt. Treat you like a human being. Treat you like a somebody with layers. Show you Ubuntu. 

That is still a concept to be learned out here. 

Even this language I'm using now has it's shortcomings, for me. I can't express in it some of the things I want to communicate to you. I want to say hello. Sawubona: we see you! We, my ancestors and I. The people I carry in my very DNA, the blood that runs through my veins, these legends and stories and accounts and ideas and memories and concepts and dogmas and souls. We see you! We recognize you, human being. Muntu! We see you, living soul,   breathing spirit of God. We acknowledge your presence and rejoice in you being. Sikhona: we are here, siyaphila: we are alive and how are you? Unjani? How are you, all of you! From the mind to the body to the spirit, how are you? 

I want to greet YOU.

But here it's a gamble. Everyday seeing faces that don't smile sometimes. Don't greet most times. Faces become empty vessels. Just bodies, in motion. Everyone on ther way. I may as well  be behind a stupid screen, scrolling through profiles. Disposable pictures with faces I won't remember. Responsive robots I needed for conversation. Ego boosters I needed for motivation. 

I think I'll take more walks. I think I'd rather smile at strangers who don't smile back. At least that way, even if they won't show themselves to me, they would've seen ME. Even in passing. I am here. I am alive. Im so full of everything inside! We are here! Niyasibona. Content with ourselves and our heritage. Through my smile, you will see all of US! 

* source unknown but definitions accepted by general public consensus